One of those days...
I'm having one of those days. For no apparent reason, I'm sad. I keep crying and I can't really put my finger on why. The fish tank needs cleaning. The dogs need a bath. The floor needs to be swept and mopped. My bedroom is a mess. I can't really do anything about any of those things because it hurts to move my arms and I'm not supposed to pick anything up. So, instead, I'm sitting here having a pity party. Sometimes you just need a good cry. All the little things build up over days and weeks until you hit the tipping point and it all spills out. I just need to let it go and then I'll feel better. It's just one of those days and it will get better. It doesn't mean anything bad has happened, or I have a bad attitude or I'm depressed. It just means I'm human and I'm a little tired. I recently read that "anyone with cancer who is positive 24/7 doesn't have both oars in the water", LOL! I agree 100%!
The sun is finally out and it's very warm for January. I am slowly feeling better and healing nicely after my surgery. I didn't realize how long I would be in extreme pain. At the end of week 3, I am finally able to forget about the pain for a little bit if I stay very still. It's not as intense but it's still definitely there. I have a limited number of pain pills left so I try not to use them until night time so I can sleep.
This week I have a consult with Radiation Oncology where they will decide if I need to have radiation. Of course, I hope it's not needed, but I'm fairly certain they will recommend it. My biggest worry about that is that it will affect my reconstruction results and that it will cause lymphedema on my right side. Then on Friday, I have my first Physical Therapy session. I'm looking forward to that even though I know it will probably cause more pain at first. It will help with lymphedema (swelling caused by my lymph nodes being removed) and help me to move my arms & shoulders normally again.
Bella continues to be a much needed, joyful, distraction. She's growing so fast! Trying to house train her is a bit difficult, to be honest. It has rained about 70% of her life and house training a puppy while it's raining is futile. She and Max have become buddies, although once Max is done playing and Bella is not they do squabble a bit. She kept grabbing his collar so I put hot sauce on it to deter her. Unfortunately, I think she liked it! (Yum! Spicey sausage dog!)
I am very excited to say that my hair is growing back! Even though you still have to squint to see it the top of my head feels like velvet right now. It's too soon to say what color it will be but not too soon to say that once I have enough it will be colored to my liking, LOL! I also have baby, tiny, eyelashes! Not enough to put mascara on just yet, but soon I hope! My eyebrows are being slow about showing up. I will feel so much better once I have hair again. Being bald is just not fun at all and wigs are itchy!!
Well, that's about it for this update. I've not felt much like writing lately. Honestly, my brain just feels a bit empty. I keep forgetting things (side effects of anesthesia and pain meds I'm told). I'll try and post an update next week after my appointments. Take care everyone and again thank you for all your encouragement and prayers!!
Today's Prayer Requests:
The sun is finally out and it's very warm for January. I am slowly feeling better and healing nicely after my surgery. I didn't realize how long I would be in extreme pain. At the end of week 3, I am finally able to forget about the pain for a little bit if I stay very still. It's not as intense but it's still definitely there. I have a limited number of pain pills left so I try not to use them until night time so I can sleep.
This week I have a consult with Radiation Oncology where they will decide if I need to have radiation. Of course, I hope it's not needed, but I'm fairly certain they will recommend it. My biggest worry about that is that it will affect my reconstruction results and that it will cause lymphedema on my right side. Then on Friday, I have my first Physical Therapy session. I'm looking forward to that even though I know it will probably cause more pain at first. It will help with lymphedema (swelling caused by my lymph nodes being removed) and help me to move my arms & shoulders normally again.
Bella continues to be a much needed, joyful, distraction. She's growing so fast! Trying to house train her is a bit difficult, to be honest. It has rained about 70% of her life and house training a puppy while it's raining is futile. She and Max have become buddies, although once Max is done playing and Bella is not they do squabble a bit. She kept grabbing his collar so I put hot sauce on it to deter her. Unfortunately, I think she liked it! (Yum! Spicey sausage dog!)
I am very excited to say that my hair is growing back! Even though you still have to squint to see it the top of my head feels like velvet right now. It's too soon to say what color it will be but not too soon to say that once I have enough it will be colored to my liking, LOL! I also have baby, tiny, eyelashes! Not enough to put mascara on just yet, but soon I hope! My eyebrows are being slow about showing up. I will feel so much better once I have hair again. Being bald is just not fun at all and wigs are itchy!!
Well, that's about it for this update. I've not felt much like writing lately. Honestly, my brain just feels a bit empty. I keep forgetting things (side effects of anesthesia and pain meds I'm told). I'll try and post an update next week after my appointments. Take care everyone and again thank you for all your encouragement and prayers!!
Today's Prayer Requests:
- Pray for my Grandmother as she recovers at a rehab center in Chattanooga.
- Pray for my Radiation Oncology appointment. That the Drs. will decide what is best and if it is needed I will respond perfectly to the treatments without complications.
- Pray for my Physical Therapy appointment that it will go well.
- Pray for our financial situation as we try to meet deductibles once again.
- Pray for me to stay well, be brave and stay positive.
Verse for the Day:
It’s also normal to be down after the holidays! Cut yourself some slack girl. Don’t frett about the mess either! They & It will be there when you are feeling lots better. Puppy love is the best!
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