Finding Joy Again...

I went back and forth on whether to share this post, but I can’t shake the feeling that someone out there needs to hear this. This year has been incredibly challenging for us in so many ways. And while I know—without a doubt—that God holds us in the palm of His hand, I’ll admit it’s been hard to fully let go and trust that He’s going to work it all out for our good.

In moments like this, I’m reminded of the father in Mark 9:24, who cried out to Jesus, “I believe; help my unbelief!” That verse resonates so deeply with me. I believe in God’s promises, I believe He is good, and I believe He is in control—but sometimes, my faith feels fragile. I find myself asking Him to strengthen it, to meet me in my doubts, and to help me trust Him more fully.

If you’re feeling that way too, you’re not alone. God doesn’t require perfect faith—He simply invites us to come to Him as we are. And He is faithful to meet us right where we need Him.

I've found this Christmas season to be difficult in many ways. On the one hand, I know how very blessed I am with family and dear friends. I have everything I need and even some things I want. I can't complain about that. I'm relatively healthy, nothing major going on in that respect. But the joy I normally feel this time of year is just...missing.

There are things that have happened over the last several months that have broken my heart, to be honest, and I guess I'm having difficulty processing them. It's knocked me back, like a hard shove that sends you to the ground. I know part of it is the depression and anxiety disorder I have been fighting this year. I'm not asking for you to feel sorry for me—that’s the last thing I want. But I would appreciate your prayers.

I have medication that helps most days, and I’m learning to see it for what it is—no different than treating any other illness. It’s not my fault. I’m not being weak. In reality, I’m fighting with everything I’ve got. It’s a bit like treading water: every now and then, a wave washes over you, and you fight to get back to the surface. Thankfully, those waves are fewer and farther between now, but they still come.

If you’re fighting something similar, I want you to know you’re not alone. I understand. But more importantly, God understands. He sees your struggle, and He is right there with you in it. Psalm 34:18 reminds us:

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

There’s such comfort in knowing we don’t have to hide our pain from Him. God doesn’t demand that we always have it together or pretend that everything is fine. He invites us to bring our burdens to Him. Jesus says in Matthew 11:28:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

This season, I’m learning that joy doesn’t always come in the form of a feeling. Sometimes, joy is a quiet, steady trust in the goodness of God, even when circumstances are hard. It’s not about ignoring the hurt; it’s about finding hope in Him in the middle of it. That’s what the Christmas story teaches us. Jesus came into a broken, hurting world to bring light and hope. As the angels proclaimed in Luke 2:10:

“Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people.”

The joy He brings isn’t dependent on how we feel or what we’re going through. It’s rooted in the truth that He is with us, always. Emmanuel—“God with us.” (Matthew 1:23)

If you’re struggling to find joy this season, I want to encourage you to lean into Him. Sit quietly with Him, pour out your heart, and let His promises anchor you. Psalm 30:5 reminds us that even in our hardest moments, there is hope:

“Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning.”

I don’t know when the morning will come for you or for me, but I know it will come. Until then, I’m holding on to the One who walks with me through every wave and every storm.

And if you need someone to pray for you, know that I will. You’re not alone. God sees you. He loves you. And He is fighting for you.